13 Ketamine Infuison

I started the spray Ketamine and was not pleased with the results. It was not helping me work through my problems and was just getting me high. Jackie the nurse who took care of me at Therapy Reset started her own practice Resilience Ketamine. She has partnered with a therapist who will be working with my therapist to make sure the Ketamine is working with the the EMDR therapy I'm doing.

I had my first infusion with them yesterday and finally feel like I hit a breakthrough again. I was able to work through some text messages that were burnt into my brain causing major problems in my daily life. Jackie prescribed me Ketamine for home but in a candy like substance instead of the spray to see if I get a better effect that way. I will still be following up with her regarding the Ketamine at home and my EMDR with Kayla my regular therapist on a regular basis.

I feel like I finally found a mix of people and options that are actually there to get me better and not just pump me full of drugs. I have so much trauma and damage I'm working through. My life doesn't just stop because my brain decided to fall apart. Having a support system and people who really want me to get better and not just get money from me makes the process easier to fight.

Ketamine and my antidepressants can only do so much, If I'm not willing to do the other work required to really process and get better there really is no point. Life is not always going to be easy and so far the 26 years I've been alive; my past has dictated every situation that I've come across. I'm ready to really live and not just float in this life.

Today I am feeling extremely sleepy and have a horrible migraine. I have epilepsy and have been able to avoid a seizure this last month with all these things I've been fighting through and I think it's finally hitting me full force. Being able to process those messages yesterday are already making me feel clearer and like there is a light at the end of the tunnel again. But the energy it takes to process this trauma still takes everything out of me. I can't imagine trying to process these terrible things without that booster. I would be a mess on the floor without my Ketamine. My road to recovery is still a very long one but I am doing the best I can and in the end that's what matters.