Day 1 after treatment

I have been extremely tired today. My brain is a little slower than I would have liked but overall I feel good! No more negative racing thoughts. Finally silence and peace. I actually slept through the night last night. Now I was coming off the Ketamine and nausea meds so we will see how tonight goes. When we went over my evaluation before we did my infusion she asked a question I really needed to think about. "How did you know it was time for an infusion again?" I doubt my intuition constantly or my interpretation of things. It hit me stronger than I thought it would when I realized she really wanted to know and believed me.

It was actually an easy answer. I didn't second guess or stop to make sure my wording was correct. I just spoke and wasn't ashamed of what came out of my mouth. Some of these signs for me are:

Not sleeping

Anxiety attacks

No motivation

Trouble getting out of bed

Mind racing non stop

Jackie also has learned a bunch about dosage. We were able to drop the dosage and take one of nausea meds away. I was way more coherent than I had been after a Ketamine infusion. I was able to hold a conversation and walk to the car just holding Ambre's arm.

It's been nice to be happy. My mind thinking when it needs to be and calm without racing thoughts. Before my infusion today my mind had started taking over who I was again.

I did my intake for therapy today and started group tonight. I am excited to get back on the train and heal more than I already have. I will forever be grateful for my Ketamine, therapy and even past because it has taught me so much and for that I am blessed.