Post Baby Chaos

I’m going to touch base on postpartum from having a baby. I had dreamed of being a mom as long as I could remember. I had a cervical cancer scare so my husband and I decided to try for a baby. It took us 7 months to get pregnant. I don’t know anyone who hasn’t dreamed of a healthy, happy pregnancy. My pregnancy was absolutely horrible. I struggled with Depression my entire life so they kept me on 20 MG of Citalopram to try to prevent PPD. I got HG ( Hyperemesis Gravidarum) and wasn’t able to eat till my second trimester. I was in and out of the hospital and couldn’t even keep water down. When the nausea finally went away I went into pre-term labor when I hit 26 weeks. I was in and out of the hospital till I had my baby boy at 39 weeks. Luckily they were able to keep him cooking as long as they did.

Every one warned me of Postpartum depression but no one warned me about PPOCD or anxiety. The rage and intrusive thoughts that make you feel like a horrible human being. I got even more depressed, between the hormones, my normal depression and being on bed rest was not a good combo. I started showing signs of the intrusive thoughts and rage before I even had my baby. My marriage suffered and so did most of my relationships. I wasn’t able to get help till My son was almost a year when I finally talked to my OB about changing meds. I ended up being put on Prozac 20 MG and within a week my intrusive thoughts about harming people had stopped and my rage slowly subsided.

Being a mom is one of the best things I’ve ever done but the damage it brought will be the hardest fight I’ve done. But on the bright side it brought me my perfect little man.

More woman need to be warned and educated about exactly what can occur after having a baby and exactly what each diagnosis is and the signs and symptoms. I was lucky enough to have people keeping an eye on me and helping me to make sure I was okay and the signs and symptoms weren’t getting worse.