Taking The Jump

I cannot believe summer is coming to a close and I'm going to have a Kindergartener...... I cannot believe Eddie is even old enough to be going to school full time. Not only will Eddie be in school but I also will...... Surprise! I decided at the beginning of the year I wanted to go back to school to be an Ultrasound Tech so I dove in and got everything I needed to take the jump. I kept creating excuses in my head about why I should pull out and not make my life more stressful than it already is but than I got a scholarship so pulling out was no longer an option. I'm terrified but so excited! I think us both having homework is going to make Eddies transition into school much easier as well. Having study and homework powwows with Eddie is something I'm looking forward too. I'm grateful for the universe for pushing me while I have my dads support to be able to pull back from other things and make a concrete future for Eddie and me.

Eddie was diagnosed with ODD so we have everything in motion for when school starts to ensure he has the resources he needs to succeed. Getting his diagnoses was a double edge sword....... I didn't feel as crazy and felt very validated but also sad because I know his life will always be a little difficult. But if I am sure of anything it's that my kid has his mammas strength and will get through this. We are already ahead of the game because of him being in therapy so long and the skills I've learned and continue to learn.

I had therapy today and my therapist asked me how it felt to no longer be a emotional ractivie person and let me tell you it's one of the best feelings in the world. I never in a million years thought I would be able to change my thinking and reaction process this much. Fighting to heal and get where I am has been so damn hard but let me tell you it is so worth every day where I don't know if I want to keep fighting. I've made strides in the year I've been in therapy and I have to give a huge thanks to Idaho for being so amazing with its resources. We're blessed and have so many amazing things coming our way. It's going to be bumpy but can only go up from here.